Do you know which is the most basic life skill that we tend to ignore? Whether you are buying a car, asking for a raise from your boss, getting a promotion, closing a deal, or meeting the expectations of your spouse, negotiation has a big impact on your life’s outcomes. In fact, there is no aspect of life where we don’t negotiate, knowingly or unknowingly.
In life you don't get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate.
The best negotiators are the children, who negotiate well to get what they want from their parents, siblings, friends etc. But as we grow old, we start avoiding negotiation, some of us hate or fear negotiation. Somewhere there is a perception that people who negotiate hard are selfish, rude, and lack empathy. Nothing could be further from the truth! On the contrary, if you are not negotiating you are losing out on the potential opportunities that could benefit all the parties involved.
Let us explore some of the aspects of life where negotiations play an important role in our success.
Building Strong Relationships: We all know the importance of relationships in both personal and professional lives, be it our family, friends, community, boss, colleagues, and business partners. Relationships require give and take, compromise, and understanding. Negotiation skills can help individuals find mutually beneficial solutions, avoid misunderstandings, prevent hurt feelings, and maintain positive relationships. For example, when partners have different ideas about how to spend their weekend, effective negotiation skills can help them find a compromise that works for both, enabling them to enjoy their time together and maintain a positive relationship.
Achieving Goals Faster: Negotiation help discover hidden opportunities that could be life changer. A job aspirant who applied for a system analyst role got a breakthrough in product management when she communicated her strengths and her ideas while negotiating with the prospective employer. Also, negotiation teaches us to set the bar much higher or aim high as our starting position. Aiming high means higher chances of ending up high in our goals.
Getting desired Promotion & Salary Raise: If your goal is to get promoted, you need to negotiate with your boss on the criteria for getting that promotion. By discussing what's required and laying out a plan to achieve it, you'll be setting yourself up for success. Similarly, effectively negotiating your salary with HR will ensure that they know about your expectations and together find ways to fulfil it.
Improving Communication Skills: Negotiations skills involve communicating your point of view in the most effective way, as well as listening & understanding to the other person's perspective. Asking open questions to dig deeper into other person's interests allows you to explore new avenues and opportunities. A good negotiator is also an effective communicator.
Persuading others: If you are convinced about anything doesn't mean that others would do the same, unless the know what is in it for them. Negotiation skills teach you how to persuade others (Pathos, Logos, Ethos) so that they not only see your point of view but also accept it whole heartedly. This can help you win deals, get better position, salary or anything that you desire.
Reading People's Mind: I am not saying that the negotiators are mentalists who do the mind reading. But a trained negotiator is able to read the body language, changes in voice and other non-verbal signals that provide the clues to what's going on in other person's mind. This can be very useful when doing any personal or business deal.
Managing Conflicts: Conflicts with your boss, colleagues, business partners could block your future success. Conflicts occur because each side holds on to its position. On the other hand, negotiation is all about give and take, which forces you to dig into each other’s interests for finding a common ground. There are numerous examples where negotiations have helped resolve conflicts between countries, businesses, with militant organizations, communities etc.
Conclusion
Everything in life is negotiable! By learning negotiation skills, you become a good communicator, a confident personality, a compassionate and better human being. Developing effective negotiation skills can help individuals achieve their goals, build better relationships, and advance their interests in personal relationships, business dealings, and day-to-day interactions. It is never too late to start developing negotiation skills, and there are many resources available to help individuals do so. Start practicing today and see how negotiation can transform life. So, next time you have a conflict, or want to make best out of a situation, don’t forget to negotiate. It can make a difference between being successful or not.
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